The Brotherhood Of The Traveling Underpants By Tony Posnanski I have never been a fan of bumper stickers. Well, that is until I saw the one that changed my life a couple of years ago…. In 2008, while driving behind a Ford Escort I saw the most intriguing bumper sticker I have ever seen. It read: “Lose weight. Ask me how!” At 420 pounds I did want to lose weight. but how? So for 12 miles I followed this car until it pulled into a Target parking lot. Semi-quickly, I walked over to the driver, who was a beautiful woman. “Please, I need to lose weight. How? How?” She handed me a “Free 6 inch sub” coupon for Subway and drove off. Although annoyed that I did not have the answer, I was delighted to get free food. I went to Subway and presented my coupon. before I could order, […]

Jill HerbasteinBy Tony Posnanski When I was a kid, I was incredibly active. I would run around in army attire, do push ups, and point at people and say “Hey you, yeah you, you ready to lose weight.” I used to have a real good friend named Jill Herbastein. She was the total opposite of me which worked out well. She was not fat, but kind of chunky. She dressed weird and she was never motivated to do anything. “Hey Jill, you want to go run a mile?”“Nah Tony, I will just sit under this tree.”“Hey Jill, you want to eat an apple?”“Nah Tony, I will just eat this Snickers bar.”“Hey Jill, do you want to dance?”“Nah Tony, I will just watch a video.” Although uninspired, we got along real well. My family loved her and her family loved me. We were best friends! One day, while in my tree […]

With 2009 coming to an end, people are making their resolutions for 2010. With that, many people are going to look all over the Internet and find weight loss success stories to motivate them. In that mix, a few will find mine. They will send me an email asking how I lost the weight, I will send them back the reply (Fruits Vegetables, working out, yadda yadda yadda), and then they will not find my answer so fun, and move on. Trust me, it happened at the end of 2008. So for the rest of this year, I am going to tell you my weight loss story the way you want to hear it. My creative variations. Mega exciting! One Simple RuleBy Tony Posnanski Being 420 pounds was tough. I could not breathe properly or put on a seal belt. Life was tough. I did not know how to lose […]

It is a weird thing. When I read weight loss blogs now, I do not look at the amount people lose each week, I look at their habits. Let me back up a little. I was asked this week how did I become such a good blogger. It was a question that really stumped me. If you read my blog, you know that I really do not consider myself a great blogger. But thinking that I am a bad blogger is stupid. Obviously I am good at it. People read my blog, follow my blog, and know a lot about me. People come back every so often to see what I write. Some people comment, some do not. Some follow, and some just pass by. Either way, people read. At first I thought it was because I lost a lot of weight. 200+ pounds is a huge amount to lose […]

The other day I was wearing a bow tie, leather chaps and shiny dress shoes. I was coming up with some erotic dance moves to “Rico Suave” by Gerardo in anticipation for my Chippendale audition. All of the sudden I looked down at my loose skin and realized my dream could never be. DAMN YOU LOOSE SKIN!!!!!! I had such strong moves. I have seen a lot of bloggers recently write about loose skin. I get asked about loose skin all the time. I get at least five emails a week about loose skin. In all fairness, I am the wrong person to ask. From not realizing I had a penis for six years to having loose skin is a pretty darn good trade off. From working out a lot, I will admit that my skin did get a little tighter. Sure, I still have skin in my stomach and […]

I read a comment on some one’s blog that hated when blogger’s write in third person This is where I wish my name was “Sweet Pickles” Posnanski. “Sweet Pickles” says the best cardio is hiring your neighbor to chase you around with a knife. “Sweet Pickles” guarantees that you will not stop running no matter how cold it is outside.“Sweet Pickles” thinks that Fruit Roll-Ups are fruit. I mean, “Sweet Pickles” does see that Fruit is in the title. Why not? Roll yourself in that stuff and dance. “Sweet Pickles” does not understand how many American Pie movies are out there. “Sweet Pickles” understands the first and second, but now it is just kids, girls, and Eugene Levy.“Sweet Pickles” loves the new workout video infomercial called Insanity. Perfect name if “Sweet Pickles” was going to buy it.“Sweet Pickles” likes coffee. “Sweet Pickles” also thinks if you get whip cream, milk, […]