It is a weird thing. When I read weight loss blogs now, I do not look at the amount people lose each week, I look at their habits. Let me back up a little. I was asked this week how did I become such a good blogger. It was a question that really stumped me. If you read my blog, you know that I really do not consider myself a great blogger. But thinking that I am a bad blogger is stupid. Obviously I am good at it. People read my blog, follow my blog, and know a lot about me. People come back every so often to see what I write. Some people comment, some do not. Some follow, and some just pass by. Either way, people read. At first I thought it was because I lost a lot of weight. 200+ pounds is a huge amount to lose […]
The other day I was wearing a bow tie, leather chaps and shiny dress shoes. I was coming up with some erotic dance moves to “Rico Suave” by Gerardo in anticipation for my Chippendale audition. All of the sudden I looked down at my loose skin and realized my dream could never be. DAMN YOU LOOSE SKIN!!!!!! I had such strong moves. I have seen a lot of bloggers recently write about loose skin. I get asked about loose skin all the time. I get at least five emails a week about loose skin. In all fairness, I am the wrong person to ask. From not realizing I had a penis for six years to having loose skin is a pretty darn good trade off. From working out a lot, I will admit that my skin did get a little tighter. Sure, I still have skin in my stomach and […]
I read a comment on some one’s blog that hated when blogger’s write in third person This is where I wish my name was “Sweet Pickles” Posnanski. “Sweet Pickles” says the best cardio is hiring your neighbor to chase you around with a knife. “Sweet Pickles” guarantees that you will not stop running no matter how cold it is outside.“Sweet Pickles” thinks that Fruit Roll-Ups are fruit. I mean, “Sweet Pickles” does see that Fruit is in the title. Why not? Roll yourself in that stuff and dance. “Sweet Pickles” does not understand how many American Pie movies are out there. “Sweet Pickles” understands the first and second, but now it is just kids, girls, and Eugene Levy.“Sweet Pickles” loves the new workout video infomercial called Insanity. Perfect name if “Sweet Pickles” was going to buy it.“Sweet Pickles” likes coffee. “Sweet Pickles” also thinks if you get whip cream, milk, […]
Read my first post here, written in April of last year. My writing style has changed, but man I was still determined.
128 ouncesBy Tony “The Anti-Jared” Posnanski I have a dogHer name is BeeShe poops on the floorAnd loves to peeI have a catHis name is MoeHe is very cuteJust a little slowAs silly as my animals can beThere is one thing that strikes meI never had to ask Bee or MoeTo make sure to drink “Your H2OOOOOOOOOOOO” I can not understand why you go a-glitterAnd brag about drinking 56 ounces via TwitterDrinking water is not a marvelous featIt is a necessity, like breathing and food to eatYet people make it out like it is so hardThey want to pull out the “I am too busy” card“I can believe I forgot to drink it don’t you see!”“I could not stop at 7/11 and buy a Fuji!” We all have our struggles, most make us cringeWe all sneak a snack, even bingeWe all skip a workout from time to timeEven have a […]
A few months ago I wrote how I was the world’s worst weight loss blogger. And I still believe that I am. Although I do love to write about my weight loss and things around me, I will never be a great blogger. Trust me, I am okay with that. See, you never know when I am going to update my blog. I will go a few days without blogging, and then write three days in a row. I rarely comment. Now I do not really respond to emails. Although I was the biggest “Send me an email and I will respond!!!!” advocate, it all stopped when I spent 15 minutes on a reply to :“We are alike. Can you give me some health tips. I eat clean also, except I love cheeseburgers and will not live without them. Do you love cheeseburgers?”I realized I could have spent those 15 […]