I know that many people protested on Facebook to get the “feeling fat” emoji taken down. 17,000 people signed a petition to have it removed. I disagreed when it was taken down.I am a huge body image advocate, but fat is a feeling to me. A feeling that is not enjoyable for me. I have never had a problem being either overweight nor chubby. In fact, I would not have a problem anymore if you called me fat. But when I feel fat, I feel lost. In 2008, I felt fat. I remember looking in the mirror with tears rolling down my face. I was lost at 420 pounds. I did not know what I could do to better myself. Honestly, I hated everything about myself. I was an ugly toad in my eyes. I looked in the mirror and saw a weak man. One that let food consume his […]

Dear Tony, I have been reading your blog for a while now. I do not read as much (I have a full-time job and I am a  full-time mom) but I try to read what you write on Facebook. I have a question to ask or if you could direct me to a post you wrote. My husband lost a lot of weight a few years ago, but he has recently gained some back. I know that it bothers him although he does not talk about it. I love him with all of my heart, so I do worry…mostly I want him to be happy because he has a lot to offer the world. How do you help a loved one who has gained weight and maybe get them back on track? What should I say or do? Thanks, Are Dear Are, I avoid this subject because I do not […]

Laura Cacdac was quite upset the other day when her six-year-old daughter Charley brought home a sealed letter from the school. The letter stated that Charley was over the 85% percentile for BMI for her age and sex. This letter was sealed and sent by the school’s nurse to the parents, which is regulated by the Palm Beach Heath Department to monitor childhood obesity and other things. This program is for students in Florida to test items vision, hearing, Scoliosis, and Body Mass Index (BMI). Laura was outraged. She rightfully defended her daughter saying that she eats fruits and vegetables, and she is not fat. Here is a copy that the State of Florida uses. In the letter, fat is used in two contexts. One was describing “body fat” and the other was saying how body fatness is different for boys and girls. The letter that was sent home with […]

I get asked questions often about being overweight and weight loss. One that comes up often is sex from both men and women. People want to know how sex is after losing so much weight. Is it better? I can tell you how it was much more sporadic before my weight loss. I never felt right about being so heavy on top or anywhere else. Now this is not true for everyone. It was for me. I get asked the “If it is TMI I understand” question a lot. It is always from very nice people who want an answer. They are not trying to be personal on my end, but want to know for themselves. I have realized that there are no dumb questions in weight loss. There are no offensive questions. Some people just do not know. Some people do not want to feel alone. They do not […]

At Valley Grande Elementary in Selma, Alabama, corporal punishment is an option for parents. They can sign a waiver to allow the school to discipline their students as a last resort instead on a suspension. They can spank the children with parental consent. So on January 21st of this year, a sixth grader was misbehaving at school. He was talking and chewing gum and being disrespectful. When the teacher gave him a note to take home, the young man threw it out. Instead of giving him a suspension, the school decided to discipline him with a paddle. While the paddling was supposed to be on his bottom, it missed on the second swing and hit “more on the thigh area” as the principal of the school said. The boy moved during the second swing. The sixth grader went back to class and did not feel well. He went to the school […]

To Lauren, “Demand excellence and accept nothing less” is a phrase used in business. Bosses tell their employees that when they receive sub par work. CEO’s of companies tell this to their leadership team to motivate them. It is used to make people better and to expect others to be better. Sometimes I think that people do not know what excellence truly is. Today when I walked into your restaurant I knew it was going to be rough, or so I thought. I looked around and saw a lot of dirty tables. There was no host to greet us because she was writing down a drink order. In fact, every employee walked by us looking down. I know they noticed us. They just did not want another table to walk in. After a few minutes, you waved to us and told us we could sit down in your section, and […]