Dear Tracy Anderson,

I feel like I know you now. Every morning at 4:30 I see your infomercial at the gym. It has become one of my favorites right next to the Ahh Bra. Your crazy weird hand movements and your dancing around in some sort of studio apartment always has me mesmerized.

I have never written to a fitness guru before. That is what you are right? I figure that if you make a infomercial you are a guru. My story is like many others. I was always overweight, I lost weight, and I workout all the time.

But I have a question for you….actually a favor. One that only you can help me with. During your infomercial, I noticed that you are friends with Gwyneth Paltrow. I saw you both in some sort of black mini dresses on balance beams and I heard she funded some of your project.

Could you ask her for me her opinion on the movie Shallow Hal?

I am in the minority, but I have always felt that it could possibly be the most disrespectful movie for overweight people. A comedy where a woman breaks chairs because that is what obese women do and someone has to be hypnotized to be in love with an overweight woman.

Because, how could anyone love an obese person.

The two people who are judging these women are played by Jack Black and Jason Alexander. Really? A portly fellow and George Costanza.

Every time I saw this movie I thought “When did fat become ugly?” Silly to think….I know.

Listen, I am the only one who found this movie offensive. Maybe because I have been overweight my whole life, who knows.

But every time I see your infomercial I think about it.

Anyway, just a question. Thank you for your time. Ohh, just so you know, you have moved from my favorite infomercial. The new Zumba one has got me rocking!

Sincerely,

Tony Posnanski

 

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