Steven Urkel was a nerd. He always wanted cheese and asked if he did that. He was in love with a girl named Laura, who was out of his league.

Then he invented a transformation chamber to become cooler. Here was his recipe for coolness…..

  • 1. Isolate your DNA.
  • 2. Turn it into a serum called Cool Juice or Boss Sauce. (Cool Juice places emphasis on your cool genes instead of your nerd ones).
  • 3. Build a transformation chamber.
  • 4. Place your Cool Juice/Boss Sauce in a vessel in your transformation chamber.
  • 5. Set your dial to COOL and not NERD.
  • 6. Let the ladies come to you.

If you are worried about staying cool, proceed to step 7.

  • 7. Clone your new cool self

And…..the birth of the coolest cat this side of the world…Stephan Urquelle. He was smooth, he could dance, and he did not wear glasses. He did not ask for cheese, which was a Gouda thing, and Laura thought he was the best.


Just when I thought my transformation was great, I realized there are many more that are more impressive.

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