Mine started off with a “Happily Ever After”. I knew after the first day of controlled eating that this time was different. I wanted it more than ever. After the first day, I saw where I would be in two years. Thinner than I was.
I remember during my journey that I got an email from a Weight Watchers member. He wrote a huge letter telling me that what I was doing was not special, that I would gain back the weight because I did not respect weight loss, and that I was not doing WW right because if I was, I would know that on the Core plan, you can only have Fiber One with milk, or something like that.
The best part of that is that I got that letter when I lost 80 pounds. This was before I really blogged. Before I was The Anti-Jared. This was when I would post my weight loss on the forum boards each week. Nothing to promote. No Facebook to push.
That letter inspired me. Not in the way you would think. I was not mad. I was not angry. I just think that sometimes anger can get the best of people. I just was going to prove him wrong.
You see, there is no “best” in weight loss. There is no champion weight loss person. You lose until you are happy. You work out until you feel right.
I know there are better bloggers than me. More inspirational people than myself. I am cool with that. I just know where I was, and I know where I am now……
So the other day at the gym, I was on the Cybex Arctrainer, and around the 12th minute, I decided to push harder than I ever have. When I am on the machine now, I do the highest incline and the highest resistance for the whole time. So I pushed. My sweatshirt was soaked. At the end, I saw this….
Most of the time, it says I burn 1800 calories. That is a skewed number, but pretty impressive. Well, that day it said 2100 calories burned. I thought it was cool, so I decided to post it on Facebook.
Of course people doubted it, heck even I doubted it. But something happened. I started to feel like that Weight Watchers member was watching me again. That I was a fraud. That maybe I did not lose over 200 pounds. People were asking if it was maybe watts that I was looking at and not calories. That I would confuse the W for the C on a machine I have worked out on for two years. People were Googling “elliptical trainer” to see if it was possible.
It was exactly what I needed. This is where I am different. I love when people doubt me. I am not insulted, nor do I want any type of explanation or apology. I brought people into my world, I expect doubt.
I do not need long drawn out explanations explaining that it had nothing to do with me…blah,blah,blah.
This is what I wanted! I want people to not believe something I did. Please, if you really did believe it, do not tell me. Today I need the doubt.
I need doubt bad. I need people to think that I will gain back the weight. That I will not hit my December goal. That I will quit blogging. That I will fail.
I need that because I will never lose doubt in myself. You should not either. There is only one driver in a car. The passenger can tell you where to go, the backseat driver can tell you that you are driving like a maniac, but at the end of the day, you are in control of your journey.
So to all the doubters, thank you. A fire was lit in me that I needed. It has been a while.
Jack, I am not posting your weight this week. Get ready.