I am a lifelong dieter.

I have done it for years. I know how to lose weight.

I know when my head is in the game. I know about those “special” days where you can start eating well. I know that if I do not eat well on January 1st, then my year is shot.

Now, if you are a lifelong dieter like me, there is one thing that scares you.

Maintenance. How are you going to keep the weight off?

2008 was a great year for weight loss for me. I lost over 200 pounds in less than a year. I followed a plan that worked for me and I learned how to work out.

Really work out.

But how was I going to keep it off?

It is fun to post your loss each week, and have so many people root you on. It motivates you every time!

But what do you do when the stage lights are off and the curtain comes down? When you eat “healthy” for life to maintain your loss? When life is your time limit.

Well….you live a great life.

2009 has been an amazing year for me. Yet, I have not really lost any weight this year.

I started the year around 200 pounds. I am probably around that weight right now.

Each week, I eat just to maintain that weight. I workout to get stronger.

Yet, every day I do it, I get more confident with myself.

I realize that this is something for life.

In 2008, this was a little harder.

I hated going to the gym at 420 pounds. Walking in with no socks and my untied Adidas shoes sucked. I knew people were looking at me, and I also hated only being there for 5-10 minutes.

Yet, when I would lose 8 pounds in a week, I knew it was worth it. I had my fans cheering me on.

I hated “depriving” myself of certain foods.

Yet, I realized I never deprived myself. I just altered the way I ate. I have always been a “weird” eater.

Now, it is for life.

I show people my before picture and they laugh.

“Who is that. That is not you. What do you think I am, stupid!”

It is true. I look nothing like my before picture. It is not like I look “thinner” or “better”. I do not look anything like Tony Posnanski in early 2008.

I have veins in my arms and neck. I have muscle definition. I am a athlete.

That is why this blog is so important to me. I need it!

I have forgiven myself for getting to 420 pounds, but I will NEVER forget.

I will not forget the humiliation or struggles. How much I put my family through, and how much I put myself through.

That is also why I will continue to leave my comments off. I do not need to be the most popular, just honest with myself.

If you would like to to leave me a comment, good or bad, I have my email, Facebook and Twitter.

So I plug away at this everyday.

No more huge scale victories.
No more NSV’s.
Thanksgiving will be easy for me, and so will every holiday.

Every day I will workout harder than the next. I am maintaining, which is not as scary as I thought.

The best part is it does not matter what I weigh now.

As long as I remember what it was like to be 420 pounds.

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