Well, believe it or not, I was actually chosen to be on a FOX reality pilot in 2000 called “Normal 420 Pounder“.
They flew me out to Los Angeles to be on a show to find true love!
When I went to the FOX studios, the producers were so excited to see me!
“Normal 420 Pounder! How are you. That you so much for being on our show. We are going to find you true love.”
“Umm, thanks! By the way, my name is Tony.”
“No problem Normal 420 Pounder!”
“Ummm, no, my name is Tony! Why do you keep on calling me Normal 420 Pounder?”
“Sorry Normal 420 Pounder. This show has nothing to do about weight but about finding true love!”
They brought me into a room and started showing me videos of beautiful women. Then they would ask me questions.
“Okay Normal 420 Pounder. Who would you give the “Love Bacon” to? Normal 155 Pounder or Normal 210 Pounder?”
“You mean Veronika and Susan?”
“That is what we said, Normal 155 Pounder or Normal 210 Pounder?”
I was getting a little irritated!
“First off, why do you keep on referring to the women by their weight? That makes no sense! Secondly, why would I give a woman a piece of bacon in a romantic setting. How about a ring or a rose?”
“Listen Normal 420 Pounder……”
“MY NAME IS TONY!!!!!”
“Normal 420 Pounder, we are not liking your attitude. We are paying you good money to find true love and be normal. I mean, you are normal. We are making you feel normal. Now, which normal woman would you go out with, Normal 155 Pounder or Normal 210 Pounder?”
This is where I blew up!
“First off, you are not paying me money. You are giving me gift cards to Popeye’s Chicken and Golden Corral! You are saying I am normal, but you keep on calling me a 420 pounder. My name is Tony. Please call me by my name!”
“Do you think we are disrespecting you Normal 420 Pounder? Because we are giving you a chance. You will find love here! Can you find love elsewhere? Probably not! You see Normal 420 Pounder, we doubt you will ever be able to find love outside of this show, although you are normal!”
Tears started rolling down my face.
“My name is Tony, and I am normal. I will find love. Stop talking about my weight. Someone will love me for me, for Tony.”
The producers started laughing.
“Okay Normal 420 Pounder. We do not think you understand this show. We are not exploiting fat people, but giving you a chance. But hey, if you can do better out there, go ahead! I will make it easier for you Normal 420 Pounder….”
“You are fired!”
Leaving the studio was hard that day. Not because I wanted to be on that show where all they did was talk about my weight and made me feel like a circus freak, but because I was concerned that I might not ever find true love.
Later that day I went to a bar and met my wife. It was love at first sight, and well, the rest is history.
Last week I asked my wife if I was normal.
“Umm, well, you have lost over 200 pounds and when I met you at a country-western bar you were wearing a tuxedo. So..you are anything but normal!”
That was the sweetest thing she ever said to me.